The other day, I came across an article where the journalist was set a challenge not to complain for a whole week about anything. The weather, her colleagues, her partner, her annoying mother, her tight friend, being hungover...anything. The journalist found it incredibly difficult, but found that after a week of not complaining she felt so much better about the world, and almost 'refreshed'. It made me conscious of the amount I found myself complaining...and I realised it's actually rather a lot. However, aren't we all guilty of it - that little bitch about an annoying, lazy colleague, or the crappy July weather, or the train being delayed? Sometimes I found I was even bored and I just wanted to rant about the latest thing to annoy me! Therefore, in the last couple of weeks I've tried very hard to ensure that 90% of the things that come out of my mouth are positive. Here are the things I've learnt...
1. Stop and think
I've got quite a fiery personality, so when something annoys me I see red and I find it hard to be rational. However if I take 30 minutes out and think about that thing, and weigh it up, I often calm down and I think things through far more logically. On a few occasions it has stopped me from ringing/messaging that person going mad, or even complaining to whoever I'm with. A lovely quote I read recently said 'don't make decisions when you're angry, don't reply when you are sad, and don't make promises when you're happy.' I think it's so true.
2. Make a negative a positive
After taking some time out, it's then time to decide what to do next. When I get angry or annoyed about something, I'll either try and think about a way to resolve the issue and make it better, or I take a step back and look at the bigger picture. Is the rain ruining your hair really the end of the world? Is it such a disaster missing the train and having to wait another 15 minutes? Is it really worth the upset carrying on an argument for the sake of it? Invariably the answer is no. Generally, we are INCREDIBLY lucky for the lives we lead. Therefore, if it can be fixed, fix it. If it can't, think about how fortunate you are on the whole. Life could be worse.
3. Do happy things
This may sound like a silly one, but it is very true that music can hugely influence our mood (kudos to anyone who spotted the Pharrell 'Happy' reference in the title). Sometimes I'll be feeling a bit 'meh' at home and I'll put on my favourite tunes and I can't help but feel happier. Especially ones that remind me of amazing memories I've made. Even if music can't do that for you, just do something that always makes you feel good. Watch your favourite movie, take a relaxing bath, cook up your favourite meal or treat yourself to something online (sorry bank balance). I find it's the little things in life that keep us going.
4. You are the company you keep
I find that I moan, whinge and complain around certain people. Isn't that funny? Now we all have a little moan and a rant to our best friends; after all they know us best and you can usually tell them anything. However there are other people that I just find a bit 'negative' - they've always got something bad to say about someone, or they want to tell you about the latest bad thing to happen to them. It's bad energy. Therefore, leave the 'mean girls' behind and try to spend time with people with a positive disposition. It's seriously infectious!
Please don't take this article as me being self-righteous because I am FAR from being a happy-clappy individual all of the time. However, I think it's important to attempt to 'always look on the bright side of life' (another musical reference).
How do you stay positive even when it feels like life really does hate you? Let's face it, we all have those days...
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